Episode 6: Ramona Sidlo
Becoming your own oracle
The first time I worked with Ramona, was in June of 2020. I had just passed the one year anniversary of a significant and new trauma: the decision to “unmesh” from my mother. Those familiar with family enmeshment will know that deciding to cease contact and interaction with someone who believes in part that they own you, and have the right to treat you however they like without consequence can be near impossible. It’s one thing to decide you’re “done” with someone, but it’s an entirely different thing when it’s your overbearing, miserable, codependent mother who has required you as her punching bag, scapegoat and more over the years.
Growing up in Oklahoma meant I wasn’t exposed to alternative anything unless it was through MTV or the local alt-rock radio station, whose idea of alternative was Bush…decidedly mainstream rock. Even when I got to Boston, I was much more enticed by the World of Basic Beckys than anything else, so it wasn’t until my senior year that I began to explore energy healing. And what a rabbit hole it was for me! I tried reiki, quantum energetics, EFT, Bikram, tarot, palmistry, past life regression, flower essences and more. During my first year of grad school in San Diego, I even went and became Level I Reiki-certified to heal others.
But something in my life had shifted me so far from these modalities. Having kids, sure. Losing parts of my identity slowly, or all at once, as though they’d been ripped from my grasp by a flash tide.
When we first moved back to the West Coast, in 2017, I jokingly described it as feeling like I was waking up from a five year nightmare. This perked the ears of a therapist we were speaking with, as it’s basically the perfect description of a Dissociative State. Dissociation was my response to birth trauma, and is a common result of CPTSD/PTSD. But coming out of it and choosing to stay PRESENT with my life’s circumstances, which become more crystal clear in their divergence from “normal” each day? That’s the work of my lifetime.
So, when a friend called me gushing that they’d met this amazing new healer and they’d had the most amazing session and that this person worked on a sliding scale… I knew it was time to get back to my weird woo-woo ways and work some shit out.
I was trapped in my house with our kids due to the hideously mismanaged American response to the Coronavirus Pandemic, and the waves of awful just kept coming. I felt beyond fried, more than burnt out. I felt like the walking shell-shocked dead. Every day, my mind would start awake in the wee hours of the morning, and the cortisol would flood my system. I’d squinch my eyes tighter against the fast-approaching awful day, and steel myself for the immediate needs and questions and requests and daily perseverance scripts of my sweet daughter.
Some mothers have the ability to automate elements of parenting. This is a luxury that my neurodivergent bebés do not afford me. I can’t leave my daughter unattended in the kitchen, while others are eating or really while any food is out. I can’t trust that my son, almost ten years old, will be able to control his impulses or follow through on simple one-step tasks. This means I live my life as their external brain, following at a close distance, gently repeating myself until all words lose meaning.
Waking up in the middle of a minefield is what each day feels like. Every direction seems unpredictable and could lead to an explosion of feelings, self-harming behaviors, destruction of property, or the ever-present threat of needing to visit the emergency room.
I was skeptical of Ramona’s ability to do deep energy healing remotely, because…well…I don’t know why! It’s already weird shit that I believe in, so why make up limitations? If I know that energy can be removed from my body by skilled practitioners who are in the same room but aren’t touching me, then why would I need to be in the same physical space at all? As Ramona gently and patiently explains, she places a pillow in her lap that signifies the energy field of the person she is working with, kind of like they’re on a table in front of her, and can then assess which of your chakras are blocked or where to free things up.
I met her via zoom from my bed, submerged in coziness, and nervous AF. We chatted for a minute, then we did some breathing and she called on my guides to lead her in the healing. I was relaxed into the pillows, but could feel crazy whirling in my pelvis and upper back as she went through and cleared out my chakras. Chakras are energy centers in your body that (theoretically, when shit is working smoothly) align from the base of your spine to just above your head, and they correlate to different aspects of your life and physical health. Most people take on some of other people’s energy, and sometimes the stuff that we feel or experience can get stuck in us, gumming up the works. My college voice teacher was the first person I heard say, “Your biography becomes your biology.” And that really stuck with me as a kind of gentle warning not to let the wounds and failures of my life define me or stay stuck inside of my body.
It wasn’t surprising that Ramona found both my base/root chakra, and my heart chakra blocked. She removed, as she described them, “thorns” from inside my heart, and empathized with the wounds left behind by a vengeful and addicted parent. She guided me through a meditation where we painted the inside of my ribcage with rose gold neon and blew hot pink air into it. I felt immediately transformed, lifted and clear - like the house from Poltergeist after that badass lady brings CarolAnn back.
That was just the beginning, though!
Healing is a journey. So finding someone who you like, who can work with you and whose stuff jives with what your therapist, gut and God tell you is a great addition to your “You Squad.” This is something we should all have. Not a glam squad. Not a financial advice team or business team, but the first string team of people who keep you at (or striving toward) peak You-ness.
We hope you enjoy this episode about going deep with your own astrological chart, finding God, getting lost and found again on tour with the Dead, and the critical importance of honoring your misery even if it shows up while you’re rocking a Chanel bag and a 6k diamond in first class.
To learn more about Ramona, or to book her for healing and astrology services, visit www.ramonasidlo.com or follow her on Instagram: @alohamones for great daily support and reminders to be tender with yourself.
Ramona’s Recommendations and Referrals…
Watch lectures on grief from Francis Weller on YouTube, and order The Wild Edge of Sorrow here.
Ramona mentions one of her textbooks, Power Versus Force by David R. Hawkins, M.D., Ph.D. - you can learn more about it without reading it by listening to this interview he did with Goddess Oprah.
Learn more about Mark Brackett as well as where to buy Permission to Feel. I personally loved the interview he did with Brené Brown on Unlocking Us.
Emotional Freedom Technique or Tapping is a great method by which to alleviate stress, ground yourself and process pent-up thoughts and feelings. I like Dana Middleton and have taken her Aligned Artist classes. Here is a link to a few of her videos demonstrating this simple, effective technique.
EPISODE NOTES: As we move toward a New Moon on Saturday, it seems fitting to share this discussion with Ramona Sidlo (( @alohamones )) astrologer, healer, and a vibe-lifting wonder of the first order. For those of us struggling with the messiness of being human, sometimes a healer can aid in lighting the path a few feet ahead of us in our darkness. Ramona works with energy, which can be confusing for those of us raised in a world that pretended magic was relegated to the Bible, but the relief from even one remote healing session will make a believer out of just about anyone. Ramona shares her journey to healing, which is a lot more like "Almost Famous" than the tale of the Buddha, taking us from Missouri, escaping via the Grateful Dead Tour, conquering Manhattan at the peak of early aughts excess, and realizing that having it all won't actually mean you're happy. Recorded in the fall of 2020, some of the astrology isn't current, but the way of thinking about and looking at retrogrades and planetary placements is dynamite. For more information about Ramona, please visit: www.ramonasidlo.com and book a Consultation or Reading with her!
CONTENT WARNING: This episode weaves in and out of several triggering/upsetting topics, including but not limited to: suicide, IV drug use, addiction, recovery, dysfunctional home environments, PTSD and more. Please proceed with caution if these issues present challenges for you.